Gin and Pickles

I have to admit to having a character flaw that I cannot overcome no matter how hard I try- I do not like scotch, bourbon, or any whiskeys. I have tried low end, high end and everything in between. I have access to numerous excellent bartenders who have not been able to get me past this. I buy expensive bottles as gifts for my father to see if maybe *that* one will be different. I have hauled whiskey back in my luggage from Japan to see if maybe the one for me just is not imported into the US yet. I have had bartenders try to slip it past me in some gorgeous mixed drinks but I always seem to taste it and it always tastes like turpentine to me. Sometimes if I close my eyes, steel myself and concentrate very hard I can get past the turpentine and identify honey, vanilla, or spice in the one sip of bourbon I can manage before I screw up my face and demand water. I once managed two sips of a scotch, Ardbeg, because its smokiness reminded me of the Del Maguey line of mezcal I am fond of.

I am quietly biding my time, waiting for the day an exuberant scientist announces the identification of a whiskey gene similar to the cilatnro gene. Maybe then people will merely have passing pity for my palate deficiencies instead of openly mocking me. In the mean time, I have decided to compensate for this flaw by becoming the best gin-guzzling floozy I can be.

In light of this, my love for the martini was inevitable. I think the Dry Martini is unsurpassed. (I will spare you a tirade against the horrid use of “tini” to describe obnoxiously neon drinks and those that do not even contain a drop of gin or vermouth but simply make an appearance in a v-shaped cocktail glass and just silently hope that you read the linked article instead.) My martini has evolved over time and varies a bit based on where I am drinking it. I have one bartender that hit on my perfect martini ratio one night and when I see him I always drink them up with a twist. I have another bartender with a passionate creativity that I love so I drink her martinis to see what kind of garnish turns up next and merely ask that she uses my favorite gin. My house martini bridges these two and nicely combines my love for gin and pickles.